I am sitting in the dark of morning...getting ready for it to begin...
I am fashioning the day ahead.
You see...today is Saturday. Or as we like to call it, Sabbath.
No, I am not Jewish.
I was raised in a tight-nit, quiet, Seventh-Day-Adventist community.
Growing up we observed a day of rest, the Sabbath, from sundown Friday night to sundown Saturday night.
And I mean OBSERVED. We had a time table of when the sundown times were...knew exactly to the minute when to turn the T.V. off and when you could turn it back on again.
My religious experience was full of do's and lots of do NOT's.
Spiritual life seemed to happen somewhere other than church, in moments where God would seek you out and catch your attention.
As I grew up, left my parents nest and stretched my wings I landed in a world that was much different from the one I had known.
I started to think. Ask questions. Read. And ask more questions.
It was probably a lot of what I should have been doing in my formative years but I was a very good girl growing up. I didn't rock the boat, didn't want to go against the stream. So I followed along...all the while a little voice was in the back of my mind saying..."are you sure about this?"
So here I sit this morning...it is Saturday...and I am planning on how to shape this day.
On my journey I have gotten lots of answers to my questions, I have read some really great thoughts, I have had some very spiritual conversations.
I have let go of much of how I was raised. I have sifted through rules, doctrine, prophecy, and beliefs to keep a little and let go of much. What we are taught as children lives so deeply in us...this letting go can feel like pulling teeth. But when we remove something, it makes room for something else to live in it's place.
I am now the adult of the house I live in. I am responsible for the shaping of lives. I want to give my children the gift of a day of rest. A day that is set aside from the rest of the week, the drudgery, hustle, work, frantic pace that gets things done. I want to turn off the every day and turn on restoration. People, if God rested after a long work week...don't you think we should too?
I want to give my children my attention. My time.
I want to hold hands with my husband, eat a good meal, talk with a friend.
I want to go outside. Walk for a while, see some new scenery.
I want to talk with God. Hear him answer back. Feel him touch my soul.
I want to worship. Fellowship. Sing.
I want to teach my children that we do this not because we HAVE to, because the rules say to, because the neighbors are watching, because we have to set a good example for others...
but because we WANT to.
I think we often take something that God meant to be a blessing, and turn it into something ugly and hurtful.
Humans are just so good at this. We can take ANYTHING and spin it in a way that makes God sad.
On my heart today is resting with purpose.
I don't care what you find restful, relaxing, restorative.
I don't care which day of the week you choose to find rest.
It will look different for everyone, we are all such unique creatures.
But we all have the same needs...we run on the same stuff.
In our world...resting doesn't just happen. We are driven. Pushed. Pulled.
If you find rest today, it will be because you were purposefully made it happen.
One of my favorite quotes is hanging in my bedroom. It says "we find rest in those we love."
It couldn't be more true.
So today I will read stories till my voice is hoarse with my big girls.
I will tickle and giggle with my baby girl.
I will share a cup of coffee with my husband.
I will nourish my family with a pot of homemade soup.
We will linger at the table.
I will create something with my hands, using the gifts that God has given me.
I may not make it out of my pajamas.
I won't make it to a formal church service.
And tomorrow...it is full to the brim with "to do's."
My list will sit and wait for me.
But for now I must go....
and rest.
